[x]

I'm sorry...I'm sorry....
for not being able
to say the right thing
at the right time

for not smiling
when I should

for talking
over the top

for being a
shitty sister

for not protecting
the ones I love
well enough

for not being able
to remove all
your pain

for being difficult
when you try to help

for not knowing
the right way to be
when you're around

I promise
I'll try harder

just please
give me some time....

I'm sorry to everyone
that I've ever hurt....

UnexpectedlySays he died in his room
Unexpectedly
I
Can't help but wonder
If his
Death should have been
Expected

Ignore This BreakdownI'll put this heartbreak on the sidelines
Because I don't have the time
Got too much on my mind
To pretend I'll be fine

I'll put armor back on
As I'm still crashing down
And it wouldn't be long
Till I'd smash to the ground

So I'll ignore this breakdown
I'll just build up my walls
There's just too much to break now
So I'll keep walking tall
And though you broke my heart
And you played with my mind
All while I'm broken in parts
I'll pretend that I'm fine

If people ask how I am
I'll pretend I'm okay
As I haven't the time
To not be that way

I'll ignore all the whispers
I'll blank out what they say
As they're

You Would Be...So, you see
This isn't me
I'm not exactly
Part of we
Anymore, but I
Am part of me
Now I get that by
Saying that, I
Am very much alive
Before, well
Not so much
I was something like a shell
And, believe me, I know
What that's like,
But pardon me,
I'm no longer me
I'm this other girl
Who used to be
Who you'd be
Without me.

I Am FineWith him, I was the sun on the shore.
The highest bird perched in the tallest tree.
The gem that outshines all others,
The laugh of the happiest girl.

Without him, I'm invisible.
A painting never painted, tears
welled up in eyes but never shed.
A dream cast away on the wind.
A hopeless nightmare,
full of
lies.

I love....you?I hate you for making me feel this way.
I hate you for making me act this way.
I hate you for saying we'll be together...some day.
I hate you because there's no price I wouldn't pay.

I hate you for making me feel again.
I hate you for leaving again.
I hate you for bringing the rain.
I hate you because now there's nothing but pain.

I hate you for making me hurt him.
I hate you for making me betray him.
I hate you for filling my heart to the brim.
I hate you because being without you is like missing a limb.

I love you for being there.
I love you for taking me there.
I love you for being the one to care.
I love you because life ju

Drunken ReflectionI don't hate you…

No… You cannot take this blame.

It is mine alone, as you have done nothing.

If one is to be blamed, it is I.

But what am I?

I did not choose this.

I am but a soul with a heavy load of baggage on my turbulent flight to the grave.

Whose baggage is this?

I can identify it as mine, but I have purchased nothing within.

So, am I truly to blame for my own weakness?

I am sorry… I did nothing to you, yet neither did I to myself…

Do you think I did anything to you?

I will never know… Perhaps it is better this way.

Carry on.

If I Can't Have You. .Her phone rings, it's the usual, "How have you been? It seems like forever. . "
Reminisce on the past five years that they've known each other
She sighs, "I'm getting married in three days,
I've got things to do, I don't have time to waste."
He sits in silence for a few moments then memories flood his eyes,
She tries to calm him down but all he can do is cry
Into the speaker, "All I've ever done I've done for you!
You're my reason for all my work and I'd do,
Anything to keep you in my life
I know you thought I was kidding, but I wanted you to be my wife!"

He just doesn't understand,
"What does he got, that I don't have?
I've got a

ConfessionsI'm only human, I'm only me
There's another side that you don't see
I've starved, I've carved into my skin,
Hoping to defeat the monster within
It eats me up, inside and out
Clouds my mind, fills it with doubt
I'm trying so hard to stay strong,
You say I'm worth it, but I think you're wrong
You're trying to help me, but I push you away
'Cause I know it won't let me believe what you say
There's more to the story than what you know
There's more to me than what I show
I'm trying so hard to hold on and fight
So keep me near and hold me tight

NeedI am nothing
an empty shell
a hollow carcass of brittle bones and rotting teeth

She is beautiful
bright patterns and rainboots
Her smile is true
and she love the world she lives in

He is a rebel
Never still and never truthful
He loves running across the street just as a car comes
it gives him such a high

She is quiet
timid
a book worm
She spends her time in dimly lit corners in rundown bookstores
hiding away from the world

She is imposive and violent
loves to fight
swear
Her emotions are stronger than the rest
taking her over in a matter of seconds

They are all me
but I am none of them
and I haven't seen them in many

Save MeI'm waiting here,
standing still,
waiting here, for my angel.
She's yet to show her beautiful face.
But I believe in her, I have faith.
She will show, and light my way.
She will come even if its not today.
I'm still here waiting,
still believing,
My angel will come and save me,
my angel will come… maybe.

When You Loved MeI used to dream about you
those days that I lay in bed
cozy next to a stuffed animal you'd once given me.

I used to see you everywhere
you'd smile at me
and you would hold me just like I loved.

I used to taste you on my lips
a sweet, tender touch like caramelized sugar
memory that I never wanted to let go of.

Now I dream about you
your eyes hateful and your words angry
all the while you are clearly happier without me.

Now I see you everywhere
turning your back to me the moment I come near
disappearing as another ghost of my past.

Now I taste you on my lips
and I feel as close to death as life allows
as I remember when you mad

the bladeI'm close to death
I breath my last breathe
I feel the blade hit
Then I wonder is this it?
I feel the sharp pain in my back
Then everything goes black
I hope to see the light
And then I wonder have I ever done right
Now I'm in this void of black
Hoping that I never go back

LimitI bite my lip, ready to go,
Crouching start, gotta give it my all,
Pushing off, sprinting fast,
Hand stretched out, my goals within grasp

Withstanding the strain,
Ignoring the pain,
I fight on, forgetting everything around me,

Vision straight, My mind set,
I push past everything I previously knew,
I'm breaking the limit.

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This Valentine's DayPlastic roses and shattered dreams
All of these from Valentine's past
My heart is bursting at the seams
Just how long will this pain last?

For two long years I've felt this way
Yet I keep my feelings locked inside
And now I'm alone on Valentine's Day
Because of this love I try to hide

Heart shaped boxes full of lies
An "I love you" not meant for me
Last night I killed my butterfly
Because you and I will never be

I love you, I will now say
For I may not be here
This Valentine's Day

In Love With A HeartbreakerWhat is this emotion? What is it like?
Surely you must know
For so many love you so

The all loved you
Yet you broke their hearts
And every time when they asked why
You just said, "It didn't feel right."

Well guess what?
I love you too

But I'm smarter than the other few
I know the games you play
You say you like them, I've heard it too
But in the end you turn them away

All they ever did was love and care
Yet all you did was give an icy stare
And say, "I'm sorry, but I can't love you."

So why must I love you too?

Too Good For MeI was so stupid
To think you would ever
...Love me

A girl so ugly
So awkward
So weird

How could I ever think
You could be mine?

A girl so beautiful
So sweet
So perfect

Because you are
Too good
For me

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Submitted: April 18, 2012
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by ~AprilBrokenHeart, Apr 18, 2012, 5:11:57 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

You say that you're in pain?
Funny, I don't see a wound

You say you want to die?
I doubt you'd even try

The scars on my arms are hidden
Yours are on display

I drown in my own agony
While you float above
Yet they still come to rescue you
And leave me there to die
Because I'll never shout for help

You have it all
Yet act like you have nothing
I have little
Yet I'm still glad I have it

You speak of the pain
But I'm the one who feels it
I need the help
Yet you're the one who gets it

I don't pity you, not anymore
Go cry for attention
I'm not giving you any

Attentionby ~AprilBrokenHeart

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

Just me ranting about a friend of mine. She's beautiful, has many friends, a semi functional family, and can get any boy or girl she wants, yet she still says she hates her life. Basically, she has everything I don't have. While I suffer silently, she whines and cries and everyone tries to comfort her. I'm just tired of her.

love 1 1

~~joy 0 0~~

~~wow 0 0~~

~~mad 0 0~~

~~sad 0 0~~

~~fear 0 0~~

~~neutral 0 0~~

~Teiasarjanka Apr 19, 2012

My sister Is in that position with the "friend" and I try to help her but it doesn't always help

~Yi-Shu-Jia Apr 18, 2012 Professional Photographer

I would absolutely agree with you. I had a friend(ex) just like that. so funny.
but she will never no what type of friend she has till its gone...
People never learn the simple things.

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